When Edward Abbey wrote the following he wasn’t an idler. He was putting food on the table. He was on track to being a good social worker or editor or such. But his intuition sensed a greater possibility. He would have to break from his comfortable habits and drag it out of his guts and make it real. In one of his journals is this entry:
I lie awake and think: Sitting in the Lobo Theater, Saturday afternoon, I was haunted by something like the conviction of sin. An original sin? The feeling of nothing, of nothingness. Nihil ex nihilo. A terrible dread. Why? The belief that I was, that I am, pissing my life away.
“Any way you turn
Any way you look
You have pissed away your life.”
I am now thirty-three, like Christ, and in the middle of the journey, like Dante. If there is any greatness in me, if I have a spirit and purpose here, then I must very soon drag it out of my guts. Tear truth from my entrails. (Quoted in The Life of the Creative Spirit, p. 210.)
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For a brief biography of Edward Abbey, click here.
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